So... I'm a little on edge. In my last post, I had mentioned that a job opportunity had opened up. Tomorrow I'm interviewing for a call center position at Bose which, for what it's worth, is money. I need a job pretty badly (I've got money to float me a little while, but only to the end of October, maybe).
When on the phone I was sort of going with the flow, but last night some stuff occurred to me that has me a lot more hesitant about the job. Among other things I told myself I'd never let me work in a cubicle again, I can't stand that kind of environment, and I've been warned by a few people now that I should prepare to have my soul sucked out.
Most of that stuff I can deal with. It's the hours. I don't know how it didn't occur to me until last night, but the hours are going to kill me. There are supposedly two options: 1:30pm to 10:00pm or (for a dollar an hour more) 3:30pm to midnight. At first glance I was actually a bit psyched. I can sleep in, I thought. And if there's a party, I can jump right in. Sure, but then it kind of struck me.
I am going to utterly lose my livelihood. My weekdays are going to turn into sleeping in, getting lunch, going to work (while all of my friends are either just about to leave work, or just about to finish classes for the day), being at work until either 10 or 12, getting home an hour later (well after the night's fun is over), then sleep and start over. I'm already too distant from most of my friends just from the stress of trying to reorganize my life, but this is going to wind up pretty much taking me out of the equation altogether. God forbid I try dating anyone while I'm at it, the rest of the world is working on a schedule opposite mine. Then all that's left is weekends, and all I'm going to want to do is sleep off the stress of the week. Not to mention this job is building up to the Christmas season. Meaning I'm just going to hate it more and more over the next four months.
Now obviously there's a sacrifice to be made to enter the working world and make money, and I know there's a lot of "just grit your teeth, smile, and keep working" going around, but... this isn't even the career I want, let alone entry position.
I had a hard time getting sleep last night because this stuff was on my mind. I'm not really sure what I should do. I tried looking for jobs in theatre/film-related stuff earlier this morning, nothing's turned up yet but I'm still looking. I'm still going to my interview tomorrow (because erasing my currently-only lead would be absolutely stupid). I'm already a lonely ball of stress as is, I'd rather not compound it.
So I guess the question is... now what?
rickie-d
Here's my opinion, take it or leave it.
ReplyDeleteBottom line: you need a job. You've got entirely too much debt to be worried about if you like the job or not. Once your debt is in a manageable position, the you can worry about having a livelihood and partying. This is no longer college so partying is very much a privilege, not a right. This is a transitory time in your life right now, so expect your friend set to change. Many will leave, but more will come in. But do not, under any circumstances, put your social life before your work. This is a recipe for disaster.
It's not about partying, I can deal with missing out on stuff like that. My worry is that I'm going to be sleeping while everyone else is waking up, waking up while everyone else is working, and working while everyone else isn't. At least with a 9-to-5 I don't have to be a phantom.
ReplyDeleteWell, all I can say is that I've done it before in a job that is a hell of a lot more stressful than a call center job. So maybe you can now have a little bit more respect for my experience (and anyone else who has similar experiences).
ReplyDeleteYes, you're right. Grit your teeth, smile, and get through it. Not everything has to be about immediate gratification. And before you get upset about this response, or anyone else's, you need to realize that people can't read your mind to figure out where you are; they can only go on the information that you choose to provide them.
Loneliness sucks, and it's not always self-imposed. People can mess up in life, but the adult thing to do is to accept the consequences of what you've messed up and then move towards a better future. You knew what the acting/theatre world is like.
You do know people that can relate and encourage you. Maybe you'll find ways to communicate with people.
Er, I'm going to stop giving advice now, because you're going to live it your own way.
Good luck.